Sunday, 28 May 2017


So I've just watched the Book of Mormon musical for the 4th time today - it still has me laughing in stitches throughout the show. I wonder if my friends actually get it as much as I do.

As I sat through the musical and the 95% accurate portrayal of Mormonism, I reflect in amazement that there was once a time I actually believed in the teachings of the Church. What now sound like a silly bunch of made up stories was enough to make me willing to dedicate everything I had to the Church (note - i consciously decided not to use 'God')

My friend asked me after the show 'did you really have to be in the apartment by 9pm?'

Yep - along with no TV, radio, newspapers, books, music - or anything that was not focused on the Church.... yet this only sounds a little brainwash-y to me now.

Taking the 'I believe' song for a minute...

- God lives on a planet called Kolob???
- The Garden of Eden in Jackson County Missouri??????
- Ancient Jews built boats and sailed to America??????
- Thomas Monson speaks directly to God??? - I actually truly believed this one!
- Me getting my own planet???

 Okay so now that I've stopped singing the song.... yes, Mormonism is full of stories and really 'out there' ideas and beliefs yet millions of people out there believe in it... with every fibre of their being...

How can some people believe so freely some not? How can people believe so certainly with no room for alternatives yet have never experienced the contrary? Just like the point of the song, I felt like I was taught to 'just believe'. I'm also a strong believer in the power of verbalisation and the more we verbalise things, the more we begin to process them in our mind and some things just become real. Ofcourse this isn't always the case but it certainly helps some people process things and cope.

Well, my view now is - who cares what you believe in! As long as you're not hurting anyone and it brings you joy - have at it!

Despite my views now, I do not regret going on a mission. My mission taught me so much about myself, other people and the world. I learned so much about getting along with people, cleaning habits and approaching random strangers on the street to start a conversation. Plus, I totally would not have enjoyed the musical as much as I do now!

If you haven't seen it already - do yourself a favour a go see it!

Saturday, 14 January 2017

2017 - Where Are You Now?

Hey all! It's been a while since my last post so here's a bit of an update from my last post...

2016 in review:
I think 2015 was such an amazing year it would be hard to top and surely, 2016 was certainly not as exciting. Life was pretty ordinary. It was filled with mundane life activities which weren't all bad but certainly ordinary.

The year was filled with memories with my partner - moving in, going on holidays together, arguing over housework, stressing about life, sharing fond memories, building furniture together, cooking dinners, catching up with friends and family and work.

I probably would've had a more positive review of 2016 recent events haven't been a little negative. My partner and I which I left off with last time have been going through some challenges and the future is all a bit too uncertain right now.

Here's the 2016 wrap up!

- Partner moved in
- Met some amazing people along the way and friends I intend to keep for life
- Strengthened some friendships
- Met my partner's parents and our parents meeting (who would've thought?!?!?)
- Travelled South East Asia with my partner
- Started another new job
- Saw Carrie Underwood live in concert!!

So that's 2016....

Interesting enough Church almost always defaults back into my mind when other aspects of my life aren't as perfect maybe because it was so conditioned into me as a child that in hard time to turn to God. Don't get me wrong, I certainly have not felt an urge to return to activity in the Church or have a change of heart but somehow, the Church always seems to resurface in one way or another. In the last week I saw 2 set of missionaries on 2 different occasions. When I see missionaries I always feel compelled to give them money to buy food because we were always poor on our mission and I will never forget an inactive member giving us money to buy food on a train once. Then again, missionary service is very different these days then it was when I was on my mission - since when was Facebook appropriate on a mission?!

I have also been asked a question recently by a colleague about whether or not I am spiritual. I actually feel quite confident in explaining my beliefs now - I do believe in a higher power out there but I don't believe they align with organised religion. Life is too beautiful to be a coincidence. I guess I have found peace in what I believe in even though the citing of Mormons still catches my attention and probably always will. I am certainly a advocate for freedom and choices as long as the person is making a choice that is not coerced whether overtly or covertly. I too often see people feeling pressured to make certain decision in the Church due to social pressures, expectations or unspoken rules. What people choose is their choice but they need to make an informed decision. I certainly don't feel like I could've made an inform decision at 18 to stay in the Church without ever experiencing what it was like to embrace my sexuality. Not to say you should be a slut (not that there's anything wrong with that, just not my cup of tea), but I think everyone should see both sides before they dedicate their life to something.

Well there's my rant for now :)

Happy 2017!